Requesting a Letter of Recommendation

⭐ Step 1: Sending your first email

Requesting a letter can feel intimidating, but it is an important part of your academic and professional journey. Here’s how to do it respectfully and effectively.

📌 Give Plenty of Time

Ideally, send your first email at least one month before the earliest due date.
Strong letters take time and effort. Professors often write from memory after reviewing:

• your assignments, exams, and project performance
• peer and team evaluations
• office hours interactions
• mentoring conversations

If you missed the one-month window, you can still ask, but understand the professor may need to decline due to workload. Respect for your recommender’s time is part of professional etiquette.

📌 A Note About Tone and Respect

When writing your first email, your tone matters. Always be respectful, clear, and kind. Faculty are not required to write letters of recommendation, but many of us truly enjoy doing so when we believe we can positively support your next step.

A strong connection between you and the letter writer is important. In my case, I typically write letters only for students who have completed at least one full course with me, or worked with me in some other capacity for one semester or more (research, mentoring, student orgs, etc.). This ensures I can speak to your abilities in a meaningful and honest way. Remember, a good letter requires a real relationship, not just a name on an email.

Many first-year and sophomore students are in large classes or interact mostly with TAs. This is completely normal. It doesn’t mean you cannot request a letter — but it does mean you must choose your recommenders thoughtfully and be intentional about supporting them with high-quality information.

📌 What to Include in Your First Email

1. Describe who you are and how I know you. Give instructors enough context to bring you to mind. Include:

• course(s) you took with them + semester/year
• projects, labs, or major assignments in their class
• any office hours or mentoring conversations
• student organizations, internships, or research connections

Once I see the course and semester, my memory often jumps back to the moment we met. It’s strange but true.

2. Clearly indicate what are you requesting. This is where you go straight to the point and ask me what you want from me.

Be clear and specific:

• the type of opportunity (Ph.D., REU, internship, scholarship, etc.)
• the general field or focus area
• any available link to learn more

Example:

“I’m planning on applying to multiple Ph.D. programs this fall in Chemical Engineering and Material Science to pursue my interest in Renewable Energy R&D, and I want to know if you would be able to write a letter of recommendation for me.“

3. Describe why my letter would be important for your career goals. This will give me some context to know if my letter can really help you. Sometimes students ask me for a letter without understanding how important it is. For graduate school and internships, letters should provide a holistic view of all the characteristics you included in your personal statement that will make you a perfect candidate for your selected program. This is not a simple check box in your application. Each letter your professors write helps the selection committee form a picture of your skills, character, abilities, and potential to succeed in their program. Not everyone who knows you can write a strong letter of support. If I am not the right person, I will be honest and tell you.

Example: 

“My senior design project comparing the two different processes for the production of molecule X is a major reason why I want to pursue research in the energy sector, and I learned many important skills in your classes, including chemical process modeling and optimization. These skill sets are also important in the research environment, and a letter of recommendation from you would make me a stronger candidate for graduate school and highlight how the critical thinking process involved in chemical modeling is directly applicable to research.” 

4. Be clear about my time commitment. Indicate how many schools you are applying to and their due dates. Writing a good letter of recommendation takes time. Writing multiple types of recommendation letters (awards vs REUs) requires that I customize each letter and then enter it into multiple online systems that are not standardized. Believe me, it takes a lot of time.

My advice is to provide:

• number of schools
• due dates
• whether deadlines are firm or flexible

Keep in mind that some faculty may not be comfortable writing a gazillion letters. I personally feel overworked when I need to submit more than 10 letters. If you are going over 10 letters, it would be kind of you to consider your professor’s time and ask them if they feel comfortable with more. Once again, be respectful and kind.

5. What to do if you are requesting a letter to other professors? Ask your professors if they need special information from you in the last sentences of this first email. Below is my list; other professors may have different requests. If they don’t ask for anything, I recommend including some of the things I suggest below in your follow-up email (the second email thanking them for accepting to write you a letter). I am sure it will look super professional, and they will be impressed with the level of commitment to your future education.

6. What happens next? After sending your email:

• wait for a response
• send a friendly reminder after one week if needed
• avoid daily follow-ups
• assume good intentions—faculty are juggling many responsibilities

If the professor declines, don’t take it personally. It often means they feel they have no time or cannot write you a strong letter, and that honesty protects you.

⭐ STEP 2: Help Me Help You

The more personal a letter of recommendation is, the better. This step is all about collecting evidence to highlight your skills, character, and abilities necessary for the letter’s purpose. fter your professor accepts, your next email sets them up for success. A good letter is personal, detailed, and tailored. Here’s what to include:

1. Send your personal statement. The personal statement helps us understand how this opportunity fits into your goals, how you see yourself as a learner, and your academic trajectory. It does not need to be perfect—an early draft is completely fine.

Read more: Personal Statement Starter Prompts

Below are short, flexible prompts tailored for different opportunities. Students can choose whichever ones feel relevant and write 2–3 sentences under each.

⭐ 1. REUs / Summer Research Programs

Try answering one (or more) of these:

• What experiences made you curious about research?
• What technical or professional skills do you hope to learn during a research internship?
• What kinds of STEM problems or topics excite you right now, even if you’re new to them?
• How would an REU help you decide your next academic or career step?

Example starter:

“I’m interested in doing an REU because I want to learn how research actually works in a real lab setting. I’m especially curious about materials characterization and modeling, and I hope this experience helps me explore whether graduate school is right for me.”

⭐ 2. Graduate School (MS or PhD)

Prompts:

• What academic or personal experiences shaped your interest in graduate study?
• What research areas do you hope to pursue, and why?
• What skills or perspectives do you bring from your coursework, research, jobs, or life experience?
• What do you hope to accomplish with an advanced degree?

Example starter:

“My interest in graduate school developed through my design and modeling courses, where I realized how much I enjoy tackling open-ended problems. I want to pursue research in sustainable energy systems and contribute to solutions that impact both industry and communities.”

⭐ 3. Internships / Industry Positions

Prompts:

• What engineering skills or experiences have prepared you for hands-on industry work?
• What do you hope to learn by working in a company environment?
• How do your career interests align with this internship?
• What strengths (teamwork, problem-solving, communication) do you bring to a workplace?

Example starter:

“I’m applying to industry internships to gain experience with real engineering workflows and team-based problem solving. I’m especially interested in process optimization and want to apply what I’ve learned in my chemical engineering courses to real systems.”

⭐ 4. Awards / Scholarships / Honors Programs

Prompts:

• What achievements, challenges, or experiences demonstrate why you are a strong candidate?
• How have you shown leadership, resilience, curiosity, or community impact?
• What future goals would this award help you achieve?
• What sets your story or experiences apart?

Example starter:

“This scholarship would support my goal of becoming the first person in my family to complete an engineering degree. Balancing school and part-time work has strengthened my time management and persistence, which I will carry forward into research and leadership roles.”

Your personal statement does not need to be perfect to request a recommendation letter.
It just needs to show your direction, interests, and experiences—and the prompts above can help you create a preliminary version in 15–20 minutes.

Don’t let perfectionism delay your opportunities. Early drafts are part of the process.

As a non-native English speaker, I personally review my own application documents more than ten times (yes, that many!). You are welcome to use tools like ChatGPT, Grammarly, or other writing assistants to check grammar, readability, or sentence clarity, but the core ideas, reflections, and examples must come from you.

AI can help you polish your writing, but it should never replace your story, your voice, or your reasoning. Committees and faculty can tell when writing doesn’t match a student’s authentic tone.

Read more: 🤖 Using AI Tools for Your Personal Statement: DOs and DON’Ts

DO	DON’T
✔ Use AI to check grammar, spelling, and punctuation.	✘ Don’t use AI to generate your entire personal statement.
✔ Use AI to improve clarity, wording, or sentence flow.	✘ Don’t let AI invent experiences or describe things that didn’t happen.
✔ Ask AI for help with organization or structure ideas.	✘ Don’t rely on AI to decide your motivations, goals, or identity.
✔ Use AI to summarize your own writing or help shorten long paragraphs.	✘ Don’t copy-paste AI-generated content and present it as your own voice.
✔ Treat AI as a proofreading and polishing assistant.	✘ Don’t let AI remove your personality, authenticity, or lived story.

2. Send your resume. This lets me connect what I observed in class with:

• leadership experience
• internships
• research
• volunteer work
• technical skills

Due to FERPA, I never reference your GPA, but I can speak to your performance, consistency, and work ethic.

3. Send the submission details. A table/list with the schools, the program you are applying to, the deadline, and the portal link or submission method. Many online systems are different, so having this table helps me track everything. I literally print it and tape it into my planner. For me, missing a letter of recommendation due date is one of the worst feelings ever!

4. Provide answers to the following questions. Copy-paste the following questions into a Word document. The answers to these questions should be rich in detail and examples. Help me highlight your skills, character, and abilities. Engineering professors have many students every semester. This simple step can help us remember and fill the gaps in our interactions. Understand that you are allowing your professor to use information in your letter by sending a response to these questions.

These answers allow me to personalize your letter—and fill in memory gaps.

1. Which pronouns do you use?
   (Why this matters: so we represent you accurately and respectfully.)
2. How do I know you?
3. If it applies, which classes (semester/year) have you taken with me?
4. Did you work with me in any other context (grader, research assistant, mentoring, student org)? Explain your role.
5. Were you part of a team in my course? What project? What was your main contribution?
6. What skills have you developed (technical + professional), and how do they prepare you for this opportunity?
7. What are your career or educational goals?
8. Do you remember any advice or class topic that stuck with you? How has it shaped your path?
9. Anything else you want me to highlight?
   (e.g., overcoming challenges, leadership, transfer journey, balancing work/family/school)

⭐ STEP 3: Send only friendly reminders

Yes—you can send reminders!
No—you should not send them daily.

A good rhythm:

• reminder after one week
• reminder 3–4 days before deadline
• reminder on deadline day only if the professor has asked for it

And truthfully? Many professors hit “submit” at 11:59 PM. Trust the process.

As Master Yoda says:

“Patience you must have, my young padawan.”

⭐ Step 4: Keep us posted

Some students feel the need to send us an appreciation gift after we submit their letters. However, receiving a gift puts us in an ethical dilemma, especially if we work for the government (e.g., a state school). Even if we would love to eat your brownies and cookies, we cannot accept anything that can potentially be considered a bribe or remuneration for writing the letter (we even get human resources training for this). So please, don’t send us a gift, to avoid feeling bad about rejecting it.

If you still have the need to do something, what your professor would value the most is to know how you are doing in your career. So I hope you consider writing back to keep them posted. A simple note or email should suffice. I have a board in my office filled will all of my students’ cards and emails that I look at when I am feeling blue. Believe me, your engineering professors truly wish you the best!

Final Thoughts

I wrote this blog for my younger self—and for every student who feels nervous about asking for a recommendation. I hope it helps you navigate the process with confidence and professionalism.

If you’re a faculty member, feel free to use or adapt this post for your own students.
If you’re a student, feel free to share this with others or reach out if you have questions.

Thank you for reading, and best of luck on your next step. You’ve got this.